Horrendous Reality of Canadian Immigration - Take III

Dear prospective highly skilled immigrant,

In Canada our immigration policy is based on a business-capitalist framework. It is formed in terms of economic benefits to this corporation…oops, we mean state. We currently have openings in the second-tier. We are aware that you are a cardiologist and we do have openings at that level but we prefer to give this opportunity to the Canadian-born as opposed to you, the immigrant. Besides haven’t you always dreamed of flipping a burger or to be driving a taxi through rush hour traffic? Canadians cant be expected to drive or cook for themselves. We need immigrants for such prestigious jobs.

Since we are providing you with this great opportunity, we need you to fulfill the following criteria when employed in your position:

- try not to speak with an accent; it makes Canadian customers uncomfortable

- do not complain about long hours and low wages; after all you should be grateful to be here

- do not be vocal about any ideas that you may have which contradict the dominant social paradigm; we are only interested in your exotic food, music and sometimes clothing (please make note: we do not like turbans or hijabs; they make Canadians uncomfortable)

So though we were not able to make much use of your medical expertise, your employment in the second-tier will surely be of benefit to your offspring (which we need to keep our population from declining because we as Canadians do not wish to have as many offspring because our first-tier jobs require our precious time). Please note that the benefits to your offspring may differ in their extent depending on what your country of origin is; offspring of European immigrants can expect higher benefits than those of non-European immigrants.

So don’t delay, apply today for the opportunity of our lifetime…oops, your lifetime…maybe your offspring’s lifetime…maybe your offspring’s offspring’s lifetime.

Sincerely,

The Corporation of Canada…oops
The Government of Canada